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Touching You by ~Midnightuser:iconMidnightuser:

Categories Literature > Poetry > Erotic > Open




I need your touch
  Your soft gentle lips I can Almost feel.
Your nimble fingers running over my flesh
..... slowly touching me in all the right places.
I miss your delicious kiss
        Our tongues, gently moving beautifully together
I need your touch
  your warmth surrounding me,
your perfection and beauty intoxicating me
I adore you, I yearn for you, I love you!
©2004-2009 ~Midnightuser
:iconmidnightuser:

Author's Comments

Something I wish I could have right now. I started this a month and a half ago but now today finished it.

Comments


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:iconrealme:
~realme Nov 13, 2004, 4:06:51 AM
This is beautiful...It gives a great feeling...
I hope you get all you want xc

--
My good sir I know nothing! But I know that much, and if anything, it's a start...
:iconamliebtam4ever:
~amliebtam4ever Nov 13, 2004, 11:26:06 AM
:glomp: if i were there right now i would jump you...and do everything you wanted me to...

I Love you so much..i cant wait to be with you in 5 weeks...
thank you baby girl,...
the poem is amazing..

i have a delicious kiss??
:blush:
aaww...shucks...:giggle:
god only you can get me this giddy...

baby....i said this to you yesterday..
and ill say it again now...

you have an amazing way with words..
:nod:
Ich Liebe Dich.
:iconwholion:
~wholion Nov 19, 2004, 4:06:44 PM
I like this; I do.
Tell me, when you are with your girl, are there ever times, when you kiss her, that you feel like it's the first time? A rush of anxiety that makes it so that you cannot breathe, correctly, for fear that she may reject you (though you know, very well, that she won't, which only makes it all the better)? Stopping of the heart, as you pull back - though waiting for encouragement to continue?
It's amazing what love can do, to someone; that's what it does for me, with my Nicole Rose.
Y'all might have your 'Baby girl' (and that's adorable); ...I love my 'Energy'. <3

Oh yeah, and the picture? That's cute, too. :D
:iconmidnightuser:
~Midnightuser Nov 22, 2004, 4:36:58 AM
Your energy? that's very sweet definitly original. That has happened to me once before. Thank you
:iconskeevy:
~skeevy Nov 28, 2004, 12:51:34 AM
I do like this poem. It ends in a joyful shout, and who wouldn't love that?! Simple, yes. I like your indents, creative capitalization. Nitpick: you use gently twice, could probably do with a different adverb. Nimble fingers "slowly" touching? Two things don't seem to mesh well in my mind. "Gently moving beautifully" a few too many "ly"s in this phrase...you could work around this problem by using metaphor or similie instead, paint a picture instead of show a snapshot. This poem still seems a little rough, but there is definitely a seed of something rocously joyous and powerful!

-wecritique, skeevy

--
:pride: *dapride
-skeevy loves you
:iconmidnightuser:
~Midnightuser Nov 29, 2004, 4:47:39 AM
thank you very much
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November 12, 2004
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